hermansaksono

Ok I am bored, and I need something to express my boredom. Imagine RS™ is strolling in the sleaziest place in Jakarta, he might say:

10
Wanna sit on my lap top?

9
68% data in Friendster is phony… can I have your email address so I can send you the statistics?

8
Can I plant my detector on your body, in case I miss you I can track your position

7
Lets play hide and seek inside my Mercedes-Benz

6
Lets do some cyber**x while Indonesia doesn’t have any cyberlaw

5
May I take a picture of you using my new camera equipped with Carl-Seizz lens?

4
Come to my place and I’ll teach you how to develop Election Information System using Microsoft Excel

3
Can I buy you 3 Nokia Handphones?

2
Would you steal my bag while I’m on flight, I need a fresh publicity

1
Wanna play with my Memory STICK?

I had the worst nightmare this morning. It scares me to death.

I ate two platefull of Nasi Gudeg, two pieces of cakes (or some sweet stuffs or something), adn some sweet drinks.

Boy, what a nightmare!

Everybody knows that Roy’s perfume was stolen. But nobody has any idea what perfume he use. As a big ‘fan’ of his, I decided to compile what perfume (or eau de toillette) that Roy™ might use:

Herman:
Berdasar baju, mobil yang dipake dan gaya rambutnya, menurutku dia pake CK One. Agak jadul tapi masih mahal.

Sandra:
BVLGARI…. kalo yang aku pernah denger……dari seorang desainer jogja, dia suka sama merknya LV, louis vouitton…trus beberapa kali aku ketemu dia……. memborong di butiknya NAUTICA

Ninta:
Bvlgari kali, malah kalo menurutku.. roy suryo gak pake parfum, atau2 jangan2 dia pake minyak srimpi, atau minyak nyong2

Yuda:
minyak nyong nyong.. ambune parfume koyo kayu cendana. keturunan kraton to?

Yenni:
Roy Suryo ngga ada baunya tuh, perasaan pas aku ngobrol ama dia ngga kecium apa2

Your tought?

Ok. This is hillarious! Roy Suryo’s (i.e. Indonesian Blogging Community’s Idol) handycam, 3 Nokia cellphones, DVR, and perfume was stolen!

Cellphone and handycam makes sense. But a perfume? Who would stole Roy Suryo perfume? Who would stole anyone’s perfume for that matter, if he already have his handycam and cellphones. Does the culprit has a fling with Roy? Maybe he does have a nice personality

(Male) groupie can be a harmful threat sometimes.

Even though distro t-shirt has become the latest hip, I rarely find good distro t-shirts. Even at good distros.

Some of you might blame my taste for underground designs, but it is infact not about the design. Most of distro t-shirts are fabulously designed. It is the way it fits into my challenged (i.e. not slim) body…… simply doesn’t look good. Should I blame my body or distro’s ridiculously sized t-shirts?

I prefer to blame distros’ fitting rooms. They are so small that I can barely breath, and poorly lit. In turn it reduces my desire to buy the t-shirt, even though is 1/3 less expensive than say Rip Curl t-shirts. So I tought I share a few tips for effective fitting room for anyone thinking to open a new distro (or boutique), which in turn should improve your sales because your costumers feels good about their body and the clothing they put on:

Tips for Money Making Fitting Room

1. Your fitting room should be spacious. I’m not saying that it should big enough to fit an olympic sized swimming pool, but your costumer should be able able to see her/his entire body in the fitting room mirror. Distance between fitting room mirror and your customer should be no less than 80 centimeters. Any less than that will only make your costumer crosseyed (i.e. juling).
2. Your fitting room should be well lit. This is an age old problem. Why? Because during art class everybody (including your teacher) are concerned more about color and shape. But no one cares about lighting. Good lighting makes your costumer looks more attractive and sublimally suggested to buy your product, which a super bright flourescent lamp won’t help. A prime example of well lit fitting room is at Giordano.
3. Your fitting room should be a personal space for your customer. I’ve seen many fitting room uses a cheap fabric as door. Some are tightly spaced that you can overheard the conversation next door. These are problems because it makes your customer feels uncomfortable to try on clothes at your distro, which is a bad thing because the more time they spend to try on clothes the more they feel good about themself.
4. Your fitting room should be enough for your costumer. Don’t be cheap, if you have many customer maybe its a good time to invest on more fitting rooms, because fitting room is where purchases start.
5. Your fitting room should be well ventilated. Ok, this one might sound ridiculous, but its true, because putting on clothes can be a big calorie intensive activity. Nothing help than a fresh supplies of Oxygen.
6. Your fitting room’s mirror shouldn’t lie. Your mirror shouldn’t make your costumer looks like an Abercrombie & Fitch model, but it also shouldn’t make your costumer looks like Quasimodo. Use good and flat mirror. They should see what they should see.

The urban culture is noted for its consumerism. But is it that bad?

Yes it makes people buy thing even though they might not need it and makes people work harder than they should be. Extreme consumerism often leads to natural resources depletion.

On the other hand, it drives national economy, helps reducing the ever growing unemployment rate, and improves overall public welfare. Remember that the massive growth of US’s economic in the 50s is due to consumerism, so is Japan. If Indonesia wants to improve is economic, it might have to rely on consumerism.

I, personally find it short-sighted if people said that consumerism is an evil thing. Like everything in the world, everything has it pros and cons. If I have to choose, I’d rather eat bakery-made bread, ready-to-wear clothes, and off-the-shelf soaps & detergents

I wrote this list during the time of reformasi. I just found the list the other day, and I tought I’d share this here. Some of the ‘joke’ were slightly outdated, but it should remain as funny as it was during the mid 90s.

10
Due to recent success of Boybands, he wants to start his own band called ‘Take This’

9
He want to concentrate to write his upcoming book which was inspired by Sultan Hamengkubuwono X’s book : Tahta untuk Habibie

8
He is doing a sequel for sinetron called ‘Cinta di Awal Tigapuluh’ called ‘Turun Tahta di Awal Tigapuluh’

7
He swears ’son of a bitch’ to Habibie and realize that he was responsible for the bitch’s pregnancy

6
To make a new world record: first country with 2/3 of its former presidents are engineers

5
Inspired by a scene in Independence day where the heroic President fly an aeroplane, he thinks that a neurotic president who can make aeroplanes is just as cool.

4
He thinks that Habibie can convince anyone to pay things using ketan rice, including foreign loans

3
Its the only way to stop Tutut from following him on every ceremony!

2
Its the only way to avoid seeing Yustril Ihza Mahendra’s annoying mole every single day!

1
He believes that Indonesia needs a feminime leader to recover from the crisis, just like when Bu Tien was still alive