Herman Saksono

Indonesia matters

Posts Tagged ‘malu-maluin’

Life - October 27th, 2005

Menyinggung Maya

Beberapa minggu terakhir saya dipermalukan berkali-kali oleh…saya sendiri… gara-gara nama rekan kantor baru saya Maya, sama persis dengan banyak hal di dunia ini.

Kejadian #1
Ketika Alias, perusahaan software aplikasi 3D ternama dibeli oleh Autodesk, saya langsung berteriak ke rekan kantor saya Thomas:

Mas! Maya dibeli sama Autodesk!

Maya yang duduknya disebelah Thomas langsung nengok kaget.

Oh bukan Maya kamu, Maya… aplikasi 3D…

Kejadian #2
Lagu favorit teman-teman di ruangan adalah Dragoste Din Tei yang populer karena Numa-Numa Dance. Beberapa hari yang lalu, rekan kantor saya, Andi, memutar lagu tersebut. Kebetulan liriknya seperti ini:

Ma-i-a Hi, Ma-i-a Hu
Ma-i-a Ho, Ma-i-a Ha-Ha

Kebetulan saya ikut menyanyikan lagu tersebut. Dan kebetulan Maya teman kantor saya dengar… dan nengok.
Duh…errrrr…aku nyanyi Dragoste Din Tei lho. Bukan manggil kamu… :D

Kejadian #3
Saya menggunakan jingle Indonesian Idol untuk ringtone HP saya. Nah, saya dan rekan kantor saya, Andi dan Thomas, punya kebiasaan ketika ringtone ini bunyi, salah satu dari kami meneriakkan:

Dan Indonesia memilih!

Lalu salah satu dari kita, biasanya secara spontan bergiliran meneriakkan: “Mike!” atau “Firman” atau finalis Indonesian Idol yang lain. Nah pada hari itu, HP saya bunyi lagi mengeluarkan jingle Indonesian Idol, dan secara spontan saya meneriakkan:

Maya!

Otomatis Maya sang teman kantor langsung menoleh kaget. Haloo Maya :D

Kejadian #4
Kemarin saya browsing di Friendster, dan menemukan teman lama di SMA yang baru saja terdaftar di Friendster. Saking excited-nya saya pun langsung berteriak:

Eh, Maya!

Maya staf baru Gamatecho-pun menoleh. Duh… maaf… maksudnya Maya teman saya di Friendster :D

Kejadian #5
Waktu itu Andi saya lagi muter lagunya Ratu yang baru pasca keluarnya Pinkan Mambo. Nah spontan saya langsung tanya ke Andi:

Ini lagunya yang nyanyi Maya ya?

Ups… Maya pun nengok..

Maksudku, lagunya yang nyanyi Mulan…? :D

Duh..

Uncategorized - February 21st, 2005

My sex-for-pay scandal

You heard that right! Few days ago, a taxi driver offered me the joy of sex-for-pay.

How’d that happened? Well, last Saturday at 9 PM, after hanging out with my friends, I went to the gym (Novotel) to do a bit of cardio exercises. After 60 minutes of fat burning excercises, I decided to go home by cab.

Maybe because I dressed like a tourist and took a cab from a hotel, the taxi driver assumes that I’m a tourist and starting his pimp mode:

Taxi Driver Look at that sexy girl (pointing to a fat & out-of-shape woman walking on the street which didn’t turn me on at all)
Me Ah..ha (trying to be polite)
Taxi Driver I know this beautiful girl…
Me Ah..ha (getting suspicious but still trying to be polite)
Taxi Driver She’s really hot, and willing to do anything…
Me Oh…. Ok, I get it, he’s trying to sell me his girls. Proactive marketing… interesting….)
Taxi Driver Too bad for a such beautiful girl she’s willing to such thing…
Me Yeah… (Okay, lets define what is a beautiful girl? Based on what I see when he was commenting on the fat lady earlier, his standard for beautiful girl is: overweight middle-aged woman wearing skimpy clothing)
Taxi Driver Just for 600 grand, you can do anything!
Oh, really? (600 grand for a fat hooker is too expensive. Beside, is she really willing to do anything?).
Taxi driver So… what are you doing in Jogja? Bussines trip?
Me Actually I live here. I was just having a quick exercise at Novotel’s Fitness Centre.
Taxi Driver Oh

Few seconds of uncomfortabe silence.

Few minutes later he started babling on how muscular he was when he was young. Then he started giving me some tips on how to sculpt your muscle and how to gain mass without protein supplements.